Life is crazy.
And that sentence is an understatement. About a month ago it was confirmed that my family and I are moving. Not just to another city, or even another state, we’re moving to Asia.
I panicked. I honestly felt like my entire life was slipping through my hands like sand that I couldn’t quite get a grip on before it slipped away. It’s not just a couple month long trip to another country, it’s a whole stinkin’ year guys. A whole year.
These past months I’ve had so many emotions coursing through me, somedays I can’t even tell what I’m feeling. Sometimes it’s nothing, sometimes it’s sadness, other times it’s pure excitement. But through it all I know it’s the right thing for us to be doing. It really is.
The days I feel the sadness? It’s heartbreaking. I swear sometimes I can literally feel my heart breaking into pieces each time I have to inform someone about our leaving, or I spend a day with my friends where I just feel so … at ease and happy. I love all my friends dearly, and there are some that I’ve known my entire life. I honestly can’t tell you a time I don’t remember knowing, thinking of, or being with them. Heck, ever since I was little I see my bestest friend at least, at least once a week. And the thought of not seeing him or his family in person at all for a year gives me a stomach ache. And my girlfriends? My best friends in this whole world? I can’t imagine what I’m gonna do without them. They’re my rocks, and the rest of my insane fangirl life that I live. We’re working on communications though, and Skype dates. We’ll get through it I know. I’m just not thinking about when I have to say our last good byes. Not yet.
Leaving my friends and family is sad. But at the same time? I’m moving to Asia you guys!! How crazy awesome is that?! I mean, I’m moving halfway across the world to a new home, new culture, new language! I can’t even fathom all the journeys and opportunities that await me and my family there. I have to get luggage, get lists going of what I’m taking with me and what I’m leaving here in storage, buy things I won’t be able to purchase there, it’s all new and I’m so excited. To quote one of my best friends, “You’re the first of us to be able to quote Bilbo and actually mean it! You really are going on an adventure!”
Right now I’m just trying to focus on the rest of the time I have here and enjoy the holidays with my friends and family. I’m so super excited for the journey, I can’t even imagine it half the time honestly, but I know it’s gonna be crazy and I can’t wait.
“How lucky I am to have something that makes saying ‘goodbye’ so hard.”